From the recording Bones
TK
©1993
–This one came from the same pot of soup that served up Poetic Justice. It was more of an eruption, I think, and it came (as the song says) very late one icy night.
The writing of it happened so fast–and with such force—that when it was done in the very wee hours I sat at my desk in a quiet shock. When I read down the lyric it sounded well-crafted to me, but the truth is that while I was writing it I was almost unaware of the shape it was taking.
Lyrics
It was last year in December on a night much like this one
In fact, way too much like it for me
When the snow fell on the rooftops and a soft rain soon followed
And the town closed to sleep off the freeze
When you called me you were nervous, but you hid that in anger
That’s how you so often come clean
But the sad part and the truth is you imagine it’s righteous
When it’s just how you cover your grief
You ask how I am, and I’m keepin’ you guessin’
With some lies even I don’t believe
But I’ve shut down in rage and I’ve raged in my sorrow
I’m still trying to pay for what you stole from me
So your promise, was it nothing?
Was it your good intention?
Was it only a figure of speech?
Was it real for a moment?
And did the moment have meaning?
Was it lost in the folds of our sheets?
When you whispered I love you, did I misunderstand it?
Do you just want what you’ll never reach?
And was our love a mirror, and your own reflection
What you were most frightened you’d see?
You ask how I am, and I’m keepin’ you guessin’
With some lies even I don’t believe
But you lied when you said love is given, not borrowed
And I’m trying to pay for what you stole from me
Yeah it’s cold out, but colder inside
And I fear it may turn even colder tonight
Now there’s someone with a new plan, in a new line of business
A new kind of ice to fall through
With a suitcase and a true heart and a new kind of trying
To give me what I need from you
I’ve prayed for release, I’ve prayed for your blessing
And I’ve prayed I would die in my sleep
I’ve prayed to forget you in the love of another
And I’ve prayed you would come home to me
So I’m holding her out, and I’m keepin’ her guessin’
With some lies I wish I could believe
This hurt here inside is too much for one man
And she’s trying to pay for what you stole from me
Yes, she’s trying to pay for what you stole from me
words & music: Tom Kimmel
©1993 Marada Music/Drala Music (admin. by Criterion Music Corp.)/Global Music (admin. by Chrysalis Music) (ASCAP)